Eulogy for Hazel (Mom) Bradford

We are humbly grateful and indebted to God for the precious treasure He gave us in our mother.  In attempting to commemorate and give honor to the life she lived, we realize that her own good works and the many people whose lives she touched are a living eulogy more eloquent than what our own poor words can try to express.  We are all recipients of God’s love and grace through Mom’s life and are all now full of tender thoughts and memories as we consider the gift that she was to us.

 There is a little story that humorously gives us a springboard for our memories of Mom’s life.  One day, Mom got a phone call.  “Hello and congratulations!” the voice says excitedly.  “You have just won a sweepstakes and will be receiving a free trip to Las Vegas!”   “Well,” Mom replies with a chuckle, “I really don’t gamble.”   “OK then,” the man continues, not to be silenced, “that’s quite all right.  Our second prize is a big-screen television!”  Mom says, “But I don’t watch TV.”  After a slight pause, the man continues, “Well, you can still win our final prize, which is a bottle of Italian wine.”  Mom responds, “I don’t drink either.”  Completely deflated, the man says in exasperation, “Lady, can I ask you something?  Just what do you do?”

For the next few minutes, we would like to share just what it was that Mama did and what Mama was that kept her from needing the things he had offered her.

Perhaps the first and most striking quality in Mom’s life that stands out to each of us is her selflessness.   It seems that back of everything she did and said was a concern and true care for both the feelings and the well-being of others around her.  Whether it was her own children, her siblings or parents, or a neighbor, or little children and their families that she served in her daycare, or a complete stranger, she seemed to take it as her life’s calling to speak positive words and show caring actions toward them.  A million memories surface now to demonstrate this fact about her life.  Even in her final illness she seemed genuinely self-forgetful of her own condition and was clearly most concerned about the rest of us that would be affected.  A few days ago, when Scott lifted her frail, limp body from the bed for a few moments and placed her back down, and asked if she was all right, her utterly characteristic response was, “Oh, I’m OK, I just hope you didn’t hurt your back.”   When she made the phone calls, sharing with each of her children the diagnosis of her illness, she was amazingly composed, until she began to speak of some of her friends and loved ones that she was concerned about not being ready for Heaven, and it was then that her tears flowed.   When she was sick and one might ask how she was doing, she would respond, “I’m OK, just pray for my kids.”

We were privileged to  witness this kind of unselfishness only intensify in her last days.  Sometimes we humans can be polite when we’re strong and all is well, but Mom, while passing through this deepest of trials, seemed more selfless than ever, which told us so plainly that it all sprang from a deep heart principle.  She was so practiced in the habit of kindness and not complaining, that when all her physical strength was gone, it flowed as effortlessly as ever.

We know that this didn’t happen in Mama’s life just by chance.  She made right choices throughout her life that shaped her into the beautiful person she became.  First was that all-important decision she made as a youth to commit her life to Christ.  This step began her life’s journey in a direction that has finished its course now safely on Heaven’s shore.

Another right choice she made over and over throughout her life was to not become bitter by the hardships that came her way. She will always be remembered for her sweet spirit that would not participate in evil speaking or take sides in controversies, but rather tried to see the good in everyone.  Her listening ear and non-judgmental heart made her approachable and a trusted friend to everyone.   People came, even when she was dying, to be ministered to.  One acquaintance said, “There’s just something about Hazel--she radiates.  I just want to be near her.”

Mom was an excellent mother.  She did much more than just see to it that we had something to eat and to wear and were safe and got an education.  She delighted in her children and grandchildren, and poured out affection on each one, with each one being equally dear to her.  She “mothered” us with attention and consistent devotion, often saying how blessed and lucky she was with us.  The last thing that she did was the evening before her passing, when Craig spoke into her ear, “I love you, Mama”; she mustered all her strength and suddenly gave him a kiss.  Now it was Craig who was the lucky one, but we all took it as a fitting token of her love for each one of us that still flowed from her heart even though she was too weak for more than one kiss.  It was the perfect way to close a life of busy activity and commitment to the well-being of her family.

She lived by a determination to simply obey whatever she felt God asked her to do. For many years her favorite beverage was Mountain Dew, but the time came that for some reason, she felt God wanted her to give that up, and she spoke afterward of the last time she drank Mountain Dew, she knew that it was her last time.  She was careful in small matters such as this, and it protected her walk with God and kept her in tune with the Holy Spirit.

Another fruit of her relationship with the Lord was her verbal witness of the gospel and the truths of God’s Word every chance she had to everyone possible.  Her well-known greeting-card ministry was an avenue in which she poured out her love for others and her concern for their spiritual state.   Years ago, she ministered to an elderly pair of deaf-and-blind people, by painstakingly using her finger to spell words into the palms of their hands, and it demonstrated the love even a deaf-and-blind person can feel with the heart.  She befriended people that no one else would, and she had a sense for those who needed love.  We can honestly  say that she was the greatest human example of unconditional love that we know.  Her compassion for lost souls made her wonderfully supportive when her children left for distant places for ministry purposes.  She was completely uncomplaining about the deep personal sacrifice this meant for her.

One trademark of her life was her spirit of contentment.  She live out a genuine faith in God for meeting her needs and answering prayer, and she was joyously thankful for the smallest token of God’s provision.

Another example of Mama’s character was her love for simple things.  She crocheted stuffed animals for each of us in our childhood, and lace-trimmed towels when we grew up.  These items communicated her love by the time and thought she poured into them.  We remember the simple treat of going on a ride just about every week to get an ice-cream cone or a popsicle and just spend time together  down by the little creek.   How many times did we gather around the piano and sing just for the joy of it?   She loved her home church, Brushton  Pilgrim Holiness Church, and it was her one of her greatest wishes for her funeral to be there, though in her humble way, she never dreamed there would be far too many people wanting to honor her than what could fit in the little sanctuary that she so dearly cherished.   We believe that her love for life’s simple pleasures is reflected in this rustic tabernacle that was graced many, many times by her presence.

We never will forget Mom’s piano playing--her remarkable skill even without professional training, and her ability to make even an out-of-tune piano sound heavenly, and how she used her talent to bless her family, her own church and the Brandon Free Methodist church, and happily, willingly play whenever called upon.  How we’d sing when she’d start playing our old favorite, “Get All Excited and Tell Everybody that Jesus Christ is King.”

If we were to think of her favorite food, it would have to be mashed potatoes--or just whatever it was that anyone wanted to make out in the kitchen. And she’d always press us to have more to eat at all hours of the day, though of course she herself would wait till last to get a serving of chicken nuggets and she’d conscientiously leave one every time.    And you know, in her eyes we were all beautiful, (well, at least until Craig grew that beard) and we really didn’t need to lose weight, and no matter what gift we got her, it was just what she needed (and she’d just stash it away for using some day later that might never come!)   She nursed us through sicknesses of all kinds, sticking her finger down our throats to end our misery from the “grip”, or tying our loose teeth by a string to a door knob.   She was tender-hearted about Sunday School papers and other religious reading matter, and conscientiously stored away boxes of it, along with thousands of buttons, our outgrown clothes that she couldn’t bear to part with, and a million other objects that she attached sentimental value to.  She loved doing yard work, and she had the best skill with her houseplants.  Even after she got sick, she didn’t trust us with her plants, oh no.   She got out of bed and cared for them and fussed over them with her gentle, mothering way, and they thrived just like always.  Although she loved simple things, she always had  a special sense of honor that made her dress up even if it was just to go to the dollar store in Malone.   It was often Cammie in recent years who kept Mom well-supplied with lovely clothes that well-suited Mom’s heart of modesty and personal dignity.

We definitely will think of Mom every time there’s a snow fall. While the rest of us were grumbling about more snow and cold, she loved it!  She would get her shovel and sing while she scooped the snow away.  On her last trip this past Christmas to Florida, did you know that God sent snow there just for her?

A special chapter in Mom’s life was the day-care she operated at home for a number of years after we were mostly grown.  She was honestly the best care-giver you could ever ask for your child.  She conscientiously cut each grape into 4 pieces and promptly panicked every time one child got out of sight.  She did more than just provide food and protection for these youngsters, though.  She tended them and delighted in them just like her own.  And they sensed it.  One boy, nearly grown up now, recently admitted, “She wasn’t just a baby-sitter, she was like my mother.”  Another wanted to come and just sit beside her and absorb her love one more time during her illness.

But a story about Mom would definitely not be complete without mention of Lake Titus.  Some of her happiest hours were spent there at Uncle Gordon’s camp, visiting on the porch with her favorite people in the world, watching the children in the water or out in the boat, listening to the loons.  She loved those yearly family gatherings there, and we will keenly feel the gap she has left, when we get together next time, but we’ll sense her joyous spirit with us.

Mention of Lake Titus brings us to grateful thoughts for Uncle Gordon and his role in Mom’s life.  He was a faithful older brother to her, and provided for her in time of need many times.  His place in her heart became extra evident toward the end, when she was barely able to speak anymore, Uncle Gordon would call her on the phone and she would rally to talk and laugh with him.   Aunt Charlotte and Uncle Earl and Aunt Audrey also were Mom’s  greatest companions, spending time in each other’s homes daily, sharing coffee and the latest news around Moira.   Mom was the baby sister, the first to leave and go to be with their parents in Heaven.  Doesn’t it make Heaven seem a sweeter place?

We know that much of Mama’s nature was a heritage from her upbringing and family history.   There was a legacy of positive attitude, upright character, simplicity, and family closeness that she both inherited and chose to make her own way of life.  Mom had a sense of orientation in this wonderful home-town that made the idea of moving away simply unthinkable.  She had an instinctive understanding of the value of family roots in a community.  We think that even she was surprised and delighted by the huge number of cards and endless flow of visitors that she received during her 11-week illness, and she would be totally stunned by the size of today’s crowd of people coming to honor her memory.

It was a privilege for Julie and Cammie to personally care for Mom in her last weeks of life.  It was a token of our thanks for the tender care she poured upon us all through our bouts with whooping cough, surgeries, and other hospital stays with us all.  She was always there so very faithfully in our times of need; it was an honor to turn around and be with her when she needed us the most.  The rest of us thank especially Julie for devoting this season of her life to caring for Mom.  We know it brought a new and special bond between them that will be unforgettable and life-changing.

With such a precious person in our lives, the question can’t help but arise, “Why?”  When the world needs people like Mom so much, why did God take her?  Why did she suffer the hardships, the poverty, the unfairness, and the final cruel sickness that came her way?  Why did we not have a chance to do more to reward her and thank her and appreciate her as she deserves?  Our only answer is that Heaven alone is what makes sense of a mystery like this.   A song says, “Some day life’s wrongs will be made right, faith tells us so.”  We know that we need faith to believe that God has a purpose in what He was doing when He took Mom from us.   And we will hang on to that faith, just as Mom held on to hers through every trial she faced.  She wasn’t saved just because she said a prayer in her youth, but also because, as Jesus said, she endured and was victorious to the end.

Jesus has said that those who humble themselves will be exalted, and we know that Mom’s hour of exultation has only begun.  There is an influence still pulsing through this crowd of people that will go on and on and on, and God will continue to crown her there in Heaven for every soul that will come to Him because of her impact on their life.    And this is what we can still do for Mama even though she is gone from us.  If we will let her life inspire us to give ourselves to Jesus, and to be better Christians than ever before because of her example, Mom will rejoice and gladly say that her illness was worth it all. Because for her to live was simply Christ, and to die was gain.

Mom,  we know you are still receiving and feeling our love and honor right now.  Thank you from the depths of our hearts for your life and your example and the torch that you have passed to us.  By the same grace of God that sustained you, we will be faithful to Christ as you have been, and we now pledge ourselves to two things that we know will fulfill your heart’s deepest desire: that we will faithfully continue and pass on your legacy of holiness that you have so vibrantly given us, and  that we will all some day join you there in Heaven in an unbroken circle.   You often said that you didn’t care if your house was a tent or a shack, as long as we were all together and there was love between us.  Well, Mom, that day is coming, and guess what--it “aint gonna be no shack”!

So  Mama,  whenever we pass by the old house and  in our memories see you rush from the back door to the front door to get a last glimpse of us and blow one last kiss and one last wave as we drive away, it will be a reminder to our hearts not only of the good times we shared through the years, but also of the time yet to come when you won’t ever, ever, ever have to say good-bye to us again.  Precious Mama, We will be with you and with Jesus forever.

What a week to remember! I, along with one of the most incredible teaching/coach teams just came through our 8th annual children's camp called Yellow Bus Adventure. This camp has taken weeks to prepare for, but it all pays off when the children walk up to the staff and say, "I received Jesus into my heart this evening." Our theme for this years camp was chosen in light of what's taking place in Beijing China in just a little over one month. The 2008 Summer Olympics! The stories Joseph and Eric Liddell (Olympic gold medalist who took a stand for Christ)were taught.

Here are some fun shots from the week:

Team colors!

Daniel Hobbs told an incredible campfire story the first night of camp.

The tent my team stayed in! They got points for keeping it clean. I'm glad they like points! :)

Skit time!

My friend Esther was the main teacher who team taught with William Straight. Phenomenal job guys! Just this week one of the parents told me they could tell that a lot of prayer went into what was being taught.

Song leaders! Daniel & Carol ~ what a tremendous blessing you both were! Thanks, Carol, for also doing such an awesome job with the girls devotions each morning!

The YBA paparazzi! It was fun gals!

Did I mention my team won?! :) Actually, I got blessed with a well behaved team that was energetic and ready to cooperate!

Aside from the fun that was all wrapped up in the week, I believe God planted some incorruptible seed that will not return void!